aside The Time I Shared

Moni nonse, Zikomo.

If at all anything written in this article is similar to your experience then yes, I am probably talking about you since you are already self-absorbed and think Pabwalo and the world is after you. Inde ndikukamba za iweyo kumene. Niyo.

Damn, have I been silent or what?  Anthu kufika pomandifunsa whats up ku Inbox and WhatsApp mpaka kutopa, mpaka harassing some of the people who interact with me all in the name of kundisowa and whatever it is that I write and share. Mumagundikatu anthu inu. Chonsecho ndikalemba you all pretend like simunawerenge, basi ntchito kupanga munch, share and jeda… enanu nde basi muzibunyula and send me pictures of mbolo zanu, mumagundika ndati.


Ndinafatsa pakatipa, busy watching and observing you all, from ESCOM, to AIRTEL, to Aunt Limbani Kalilani being the envy of every diva side chick out there cause of his hair style choices, to saving dates  to kupsyesana mitima to azimayi expressing the pride of nyini zawo to Key Essentials and milking people’s money in the name of berets… hahaha… mukumagundika ndikuti, kupsyesana mitima. We are all just angry people out here taking it one  day at a time. Kuteloko apa ndikukamba apa wina wapanga kale munch this paragraph and shared to some group… kugundika.

Speaking of sharing, although I have been silent, sikuti ndinatha iyayi, ndangophunzira kukhala chete about what I do, its refreshing to have people wondering how broke you are, how lonely you are, who have you been fucking, kuti ku nyini kuli akangaude ochuluka bwanji… refreshing. But recently I had sex with a guy and another girl at once, a ménage à trois. The reason why its such a big deal to share is cause I don’t particularly like sharing, be it chips chapa chiwaya, chaku KFC, internet bundle, ndalama, kaya mbolo, I don’t like sharing.

But I also like trying out new things before having an opinion. And yes, its kinda late for a wild girl like me to be having  threesomes. Ndichite kunena kangati kuti I don’t like sharing. I am an OVOP kinda chick, one vagina, one penis, let the two battle each other out into multiple orgasms.

Anyway, I did not in anyway plan it. It was one of those dry days when there is nothing to do, not that Blantyre is dry, kuli ma Bossaro, kuli Ken Gunz kuno  ndi ma diva opasa chidwi… its never dry here koma it was dry that day. I did not want to go out or what so ndinayamba kumwa pa den cham’ma 2 kuti mwina by 9 ndikhala ntablaka, simple things. Later on anthu ena obhoweka atandifunsa ma plan nkumva zoti ndufuna ku blaka, anatulukira ndi mowa wawo kenaka basi ka gulu kachuluka.

Anthu enawo ankangofuna koyambira, they said ma Bossaro ali ndi chani kaya later on (told you kuli ma bossaro kuno, sasowa zochita). Ine ndi some guy I occasionally fuck and another girl he usually fucks were the ones drinking za serious. Nde paja pamakhala that one guy who always has weed, anachifwamphula chindudu cha chamba, and we carried on.

At around 7, ma member left us three to go about their night,  with the munchies hitting the rest of us we decided to grab some debonaires pizza and carry on the fun. Titabwerako tinapeza magetsi atha koma basi kaya chinali chamba, kaya ulesi, I didn’t bother buying, just switched on battery powered lights and continued.

If you have hang around me you may have noticed that conversations lead to sexual topics real quick, nde basi the three of us started talking about sexscapades and debates, before you know it tayamba kupanga ma “dare”. Now, when this game springs out during a turn up just know that there are some people within the group who have been wanting to do something or some members of the group want some people to do something. If you wanna play an innocent game timasewera “concentration” (Costaleshoni) or “Categories” (m’mene amanenera ana aku Saints, KA or anthu oti anakhalako ku States for 2 minutes and never let us forget and we all know are never going back).

Anyway, ma dare ayambapo, ma kiss pamenepaja ( I have kissed and fucked a girl before so it wasn’t new to kiss a girl and no biggie), kenaka ma dare kulowera ku zovula Malaya and stuff like that. Before you know it, anthu tasala ndi underwear yekha, takisanakisana, tadyesana pizza, tasuta chamba, taledzera, tapasana zinyere.

Both of us girls had already slept or have been sleeping with this guy so at that point I think we all knew something big was going to happen. I dared the other girl to give the guy a blow job and bloody hell she went on, knelt before him, removed his briefs slowly and took him in her mouth just as slow. The guy and I locked eyes for a minute, then I took of gulp of the brandy I was drinking then went over and started kissing him. Last thing I coherently  heard from the Bluetooth speaker before sex craze took over was the song “Wild Thoughts.” I don’t know why I shared that bit of information but up until now, that song just makes me wanna fuck two people at once.

Everything was going on fine with the kissing, him fondling my breasts and the other girl eating his dick where he would occasionally lose focus on the kissing, look down on his penis being devoured then kiss me urgently. I don’t even remember how the rest of my clothes got removed but they were gone at some point and the light began to dim. When the other girl seemed to have finished with his dick, she came up to kiss the guy, I went down and continued for a bit then sat on his penis, slowly. Guy didn’t even have time to groan because the other girl was all up in his face kissing him.

I don’t remember having an orgasm from that, because I got off at some point, he bent the other girl over, took her from behind, I lay in under her where she began licking and sucking me off. I told you the last coherent thing I remember was the song because after that was all moans and groans. I wasn’t even calling out the guy’s name, I definitely remember that. The house was filled with sex noises. I do however remember also I had an orgasm from the girl licking my clit and the view of the guy’s expressions as he slammed into her.

I don’t remember what time they left or what happened after that. I do remember waking up in the morning to no power and recalling that my units had finished. I woke up naked of course, with crumbs of pizza all over me and embarrassing memories of what happened. I gotta say, they have never returned to my house after that night either cause they are embarrassed or we all think it may happen again. Tikakumana m’ma 15 ndi Dusk umu, timangopasana ma wave, kumwa ma shot and leave each other.

Zokuti mwina tinapasana matenda kaya chani tizadziwa podzayezesa when the need arises.

N’nakuuzani, anthufe, tikumagundika.


Ndatha ine wanu,


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